The doctrine of right man, right woman

1. There are three gifts from Jesus Christ given in the scripture. The first is the right woman; He built it. The second is salvation; He did it. The third is doctrine; He thought it. Doctrine is the mind of Christ — 1 Corinthians 2:16. Historically speaking the first gift that Jesus Christ ever gave to man was a right woman.

2. Right woman is the oldest gift in human history. When man was created Jesus Christ said, “Not good that man should be alone” — Genesis 2:18. Therefore in grace Jesus Christ constructed a right woman for the man and brought the woman to the man. The relationship was established from the beginning during innocence and continued after the fall. The fall did not change the relationship. It was designed for maximum human happiness and even an unbeliever with failure and otherwise a miserable life can find great happiness in this gift from Jesus Christ. So it is a gift for the unbeliever as well as the believer — Ecclesiastes 9:9. The phrase “live joyfully” is not correct. The qal imperative from raah means to see, but we have with it a plural noun chajiim, and together this phrase means literally, “see lives.” However, it is an idiom which means “enjoy life.” Here is a command to the unbeliever; the unbeliever can actually enjoy life provided that the rest of this verse is fulfilled — “with the wife whom thou lovest.” He keeps on loving her, this is linear aktionsart here. The principle is very important. If a man is a total failure and he finds his right woman he is going to he happier than the man who is a total success and doesn’t find his right woman.

3. The greatest attack on the gift and the divine law comes in the soul. Various stages of reversionism such as blackout of the soul, scar tissue of the soul, emotional revolt, are attackers of this principle. The attack comes through fornication or promiscuity — Proverbs 5; 6:20-32; 1 Corinthians 11:3-16; Jeremiah 31:22.

4. The perversions of the doctrine. a) Autoerotism or masturbation. In this, self responds to self and that is a perversion. b) Homosexuality or lesbianism — Leviticus 18:22; Romans 1:26,27. Homosexuals are not sick, they are sinful. There never has been and there never will be a sin for which there is not a solution, a spiritual solution from the Word of God. c) Bestiality, sexual response to animals — Leviticus 18:23. d) The only normal perversion of right man, right woman: fornication. This is normal, it is a perversion of the divine institution — Exodus 20:14; Proverbs 5:20; 6:32.

5. Mental attitude sins are destructive to right man, right woman relationship. Song of Solomon, chapter 8. This passage is dealing with the Shulamite woman who is in love with the shepherd. She is the most beautiful woman in the land. We know that because Solomon has discovered her. He took her into his harem but was unsuccessful in seducing her. In verse 6 we now see that the shepherd lover has rescued her from Solomon who is the villain and he now speaks to the Shulamite woman which is his right woman. They have a category #2 love. God did not use this woman until she had been used to punish Solomon — Proverbs 5. She wore category #2 love in her soul like a chastity belt. Her love for her right man, her shepherd lover, was stronger than anything in her life.

The soul relationship is expressed when the shepherd lover says in verse 6, “Set me as a seal upon thine heart.” ‘Set me’ is the qal imperative of sum and it means impress. The word for ‘seal’ means a signet ring which the woman had been carrying around her neck. This signet ring signifies waiting for the right man. And just as in category #2 love the woman gives herself soul and body to her right man so she placed the signet ring on his finger to portray the perfect relationship which would exist between them. He is saying in effect, “The ring that you are carrying around your neck, put it on my finger.” ‘Upon thine’ heart refers to her right lobe. Because of the mental attitude love she has in her right lobe the ring goes on his finger. So soul love precedes sex love in this principle. The right man must be in the right woman’s soul before she can respond to him and for this reason this woman would never be satisfied with another. That is why she has rejected Solomon in all of his glory. We actually have the principle here of soul climax which is found in 1 Corinthians 7:9 as well.

“as a seal upon thine arm” — the arm here means her strength or her power. The word also means fingers, indicating marriage. But the real concept here is that the woman has a great soul strength, great soul energy which can only respond to her right man. A woman’s animation comes from the relationship with her right man.

He expresses the principle of category #2 when he says “love is as strong as death.” And then he states the great enemy of category #2 love, “jealousy is as cruel as the grave.” In a relationship between a man and a woman there is often a great deal of cruelty and this is brought about by the mental attitude sins which attack the principle.

“her flame [love] are flames of fire, the flame of the Lord” [incorrect in the English of the KJV] — in other words, it is the same as the seal upon her arm, she has a phenomenal soul love for this man. Her soul energy is a flame which, of course, causes her body to turn into a flame. The origin of this great soul and sexual response — “the flame of the Lord.” So all right man, right woman love is divinely designed.

Verse 7 — “Many waters cannot quench love” is literally, “not able to quench love.” Many waters referred to pressures. Many pressures in life are not able to extinguish category #2 love. The flame of verse 6 now takes us to water. What puts out a flame? Water. But many waters are not able to extinguish the love. “Many waters cannot extinguish the love, neither can floods of water drown it.” The principle: Mental attitude sins can destroy right man, right woman relationship but apart from this there can be no destruction of it.

6. Negative volition toward doctrine destroys right man, right woman relationship. Jeremiah 15:15-21; 16:1,2; 17:9-11; 12:7-9; 15:8,9.

7. The analogies of right man, right woman: a) Right man, right woman are used to teach many types of doctrine. This is because this is one of the most common relationships in the human race. b) The right man is the shepherd and bishop of the right woman’s soul, just as Christ is the shepherd and bishop of the believer’s soul — 1 Peter 2:25 cf. 3:1. c) The right woman is the glory of the man just as the believer in supergrace is the glory of God — 1 Corinthians 11:7.

8. This principle is also related to the laws of divine establishment under the principle of monogamy. Monogamy is ordained of God to remind mankind that there is only one right woman for one right man, and visa versa. 1 Corinthians 7:2-4. Under the laws of establishment the right man, right woman relationship becomes divine institution #2, or marriage. Marriage is still the protection of category #2 love, as per Hebrews 13:4; 1 Corinthians 7:9; 1 Timothy 5:14; Romans 7:2,3; Genesis 2:24,25; Ephesians 5:22,25, 28,31,33. Marriage forms the basis for stability in society and rejects the theory of both anarchy, promiscuity, and communal living. Anarchy and promiscuity comes when there is not a recognised system of marriage. Since the right man, right woman relationship was designed for the ultimate in human happiness marriage is both the protection and the boundary for category #2 love. Marriage is also protected by the divine institution #3 where parents have the responsibility for training their children, not someone else’s. The man is the authority in marriage. God protects the woman, however, from tyranny. The man with authority is first a little boy trained and taught by his mother. Mother teaches him respect for womanhood by both her teaching and by her life, and this keeps him from becoming an animal — Proverbs 31:1,2.

9. The relationship at the fall of mankind. This relationship preceded the fall. For a long, long time the man and the woman lived in a state of innocence which means no sin and no sin nature. But after the fall God confirms the fact that the husbands authority is not changed. At the fall, the husband was listening when he should have been talking. The woman did the talking, she offered the fruit and he took it. Even after the man took the fruit God confirmed the fact that in the laws of divine establishment with the old sin nature the man is still in charge — Genesis 3:16; Ephesians 5:22. However, in the fall man and the woman reversed their roles — Genesis 3:6. Until this time sex had been a pleasure and total happiness and now it becomes a means of perpetuating the human race as a secondary role of sex. But it is the secondary role that always gets everyone because without children they have only each other to think of. Once there are children there is something else to think of and a new authority develops in the home, the parents over the children. As a result of this there are some problems in right man, right woman relationship.

10. The right woman is still a great gift from the Lord — Proverbs 18:22 is not correctly translated in the KJV. It should be: “He who has acquired his right woman has acquired the good from the Lord, and he has received the object of his delight from the Lord.” The Lord brought the first woman to the first man in grace. Adam, the man, recognised her in his soul. He called her Isha, part of himself. This explains the burning of 1 Corinthians 7:9 which is not a wave of libido but the soul climax every compartment of the soul’s essence is stimulated by total concentration on the one you love. The word for ‘good’ here means that he has acquired the original gift from God to man. The original gift was the right woman.